Running Joggers. How obvious.

I was walking the two dogs I dog sit today, and a jogger went by me. I smiled, assuming that he probably wouldn't see, because he is jogging, but to my surprise, he said a "hello" back.

How odd.

It's only odd because I've never had a jogger say anything to me before. For a jogger, is speaking some sort of higher-class jogger? Do you have more prestige if you can jog and talk at the same time? I guess some what. I mean, when I used to do runs in highschool, my friend would be talking to me while we ran expecting an answer. No can do buddy. I'm just not that skilled where I can excersise AND talk at the same time.

Some people call it out of shape. I call it breathing difficulties.

Adventures in Construction: BARF! eww, eww, eww, gross!

Oh my GOODNESS.

I have managed for at least two months not to be bluntly hit on by construction guys, and I fancy the way that was; carefree, comfortable, not creeped out. That has now come to an end, as of today.

If you have read my previous 'Adventures in Construction' stories, you would know that the siders creep me out the most. I try my best to not interact with them...at all. Who would of thought that these would be the men who would hit on me. Actually, I choose not to think about it too much.

Today there was about 14 people on site, which wasn't very many at all; Jim joked that everyone knew he was leaving early so noone bothered to show up. By the end of the day, there was probably about two framers or so still there, four lazy siders not working (as usually), and me. Because Jim left early and it's a weekend, I had to close up everything; close the windows, the sliding doors, lock the back doors, close the garage doors...basically walk about a million stairs. So I'm trying to plan out how I'm going to work around the siders; I can't work around the siders. All their equiptment is in the garage I have to go by to finish garage door shutting and to get to my car (so unfortunate...), so basically I have to suck it up, and try my best to pretend they aren't there.

That's kind of hard when they're staring at you.

And I mean staring. This isn't the kind of staring you do if you don't want to be obvious.

The security guy came (thank goodness) and started helping me close windows and doors, which was very nice of him to do, because that meant I would be able to leave eariler and THAT meant I wouldn't have to be around the creepiers for awhile.

Side note: Jim and I were talking about all the guys on the site the other day,
and he was the one who brought up how sketchy these guys are. I think that kind
of puts things in better perspective for you readers.

So I was closing the unit right across from the garage where all the guys where standing (and talking, and drinking beer, and staring...basically not working), when I realized I only had one more unit to shut down, then I could leave. But guess which unit that was. The one they were standing in front of, which meant I would have to walk through them. Not cool.

So I sucked it up, and towards the garage and through the guys. The guys were watching me. I made eye contact with one of the guys and smiled at him, and then attempted to continue on my way without vocal interaction. Then one of the guys said, "Are you having fun closing all the doors?"

Honestly, that question is asked ALL THE TIME. DUH, no I'm not having fun, if you think it's fun, then why don't YOU do it? If you want to talk to me, come up with something better. Unfortunately, they came up with something worse.

So I said, "Oh yeah, I'm having a blast", rolled my eyes, got a laughing response, and then I headed straight for inside the building. "FREE!" is basically what I thought, but then I saw that I missed a window from the building I was just at across from the unit I was currently in. AGH! I just want to go home.

So I suck it up once again, and attempt to walk to the other unit, which meant I had to walk through the guys again. This time, one of the guys says something to the effect of, "Do you want a beer?" and then another guy said, "She probably wants a beer."

The first guy says, "Hey, do you like alchohol?" This guy is basically the ring leader of the four guys. He does most of the talking while the others listen, make side comments, watch my reactions, and STARE.

"Pardon?"

"Do you like to drink."

"Uh, not really." I'm opening the garage to try my best to hurry and close the window so I can leave.

"Nah, most women don't like to drink." A side comment from one of the guys, and some other mumbles which I didn't try to figure out.

Ring leader: "Do you smoke?"

"Do I smoke? Uh...ha...no." Walk into the building. go. GO.

Other guys: "Does she smoke?" Laughing.

Ring leader: Laughing. "I don't know."

I close the window. Now for my grand escape. What would be ideal would be me exiting to my car after I close the garage, and them not saying anything to me and vise versa. But I knew that wouldn't happen, so I thought it best if I said something sort first so it wouldn't be majorly awkward, then I could leave...fast.

So I closed the garage, and then said, "Have a good weekend guys."

Guys: "Oh yeah, you too." "Have a good weekend" "Blahblah."

I thought we were done. I thought I could leave. I was horribly mistaken.

Ring leader: "Hey by the way, what's your name?"

"Pardon?" Don't forget I was listening to music in hopes that they wouldn't ask me questions. It failed miserably.

Ring leader: "What's your name, I didn't catch it."

Guys: Staring.

"Amanda"

Ring leader: "Oh it's Amanda."

One of the guys: "Even I knew her name."

...how did he know my name?

Other guys: Mumbling.

Ring leader: "Well I'm Chris, this is so and so, this is blahblah and this is blahblah."

That's nice but I don't really care...ps. I'm slowly making my way away from them, hoping they would stop talking to me and let me go to my car, far, far away from them.

"Well nice to meet -"

Ring leader (aka Chris): "So is Jim like your father-in-law?"

Just getting right to the point I see...*shutter* Asking if I'm married eh? HAHAHA. AH ha. You wish I was older, sick 30 year old man.

"No. Garrit is my brother-in-law so technically I'm not relat-"

My mom said I should of said yes.

One of the other guys: "So Garrit is dating your sister?"

Let us pause for a moment to the stupidity of this comment. BROTHER-IN-LAW. MARRIED. TAKE FAMILY EDUCATION.

"No, Garrit is married to my sister."

Guys: "Oh" "Yeah" Oh"

I realllllly wanted to leave.

Ring leader: "So...are you single?"

"No."

But it wasn't like a normal 'no'. Most people would have the question asked, then there would be a split second pause, then there would come the 'no'. There was no split second pause. It was abrupt. I wanted them to know I was taken, and by golly I let them know.

Guys: "Awww" "You shouldn't have told us" "Why did you ask her?" Laughing. Some other comments were mumbled and being laughed at.

They pretty much bluntly told me they've been looking at me, and I'm pretty sure the ring leader wanted/s a piece. The ring leader is actually the same sider I heard having a conversation with the sweet electrication Harvey, at the point where I heard Harvey say to Chris, "Man, she's like 19 or 20" and as soon as I came outside, the conversation stopped. I tried to assume it wasn't about me, but I can't assume that anymore. He wants a piece, and that's gross.

I left while they were laughing, and they said, "Have a good weekend!" And I said, "You too!"

Then I walked away (run Amanda, RUN), gagging I think, and trying not to twitch. Then I called Alicia, and I had a convulsion.

I can just imagine work on Monday.

"Hellloooo Amanda..."

"I DON'T KNOW YOUR NAME, GET AWAY FROM ME!"

Now that I know 30-40 year old men think I'm hot, I'm set for life! AGHHHH!

I want some soap.

Adventures with Construction and other stories: Part II

Chapter Five: Egor

I forget what day it was, it must of been yesterday or the day before, but I was eating lunch in the trailor like usual, and then a guy comes in to talk to Jim my boss. Now there are always guys coming in to talk to Jim, because they need to check up on things and ask questions and so forth, and they aren't really private; hearing them isn't a problem.

So I was sitting there, eating my sandwich, and then the guy that came in started to talk.

Now I'm not meaning to be mean, and I'm only speaking the truth, but this guy sounded like Egor. You know, "yessssss master", except he didn't say that, because that would be creepy. Maybe he smokes, who knows. All I know is, I didn't think anyone really spoke like that, I thought it was a joke voice. Apparently not.

Chapter Six: Porter Potty Adventures

I've been able to put off for almost a month using the porter pottys. I heard terrible stories about them, which would be a girl not want to use them, even guys for that matter. I tried to time my pees so I wouldn't have to go till after work, or I would be able to hold it until I got home. Or sometimes if I really had to go, I would sneak into the buildings where the plumbing worked and use the toliets in there; thought I could only do that twice because they started to put carpet in. So I guess this week I timed my bathroom breaks wrong, and I had to go. And I mean go like a banshee. There is nothing worse then working in a building that has a toliet, but not being able to use it because it doesn't work yet. Oh man. Tear. Anyways, because I was so desperate to relieve myself, I just went to go to the pottys. I didn't even care. And this was what I found.

On the inside of the porter, there was stuff written on it, and it looked like it was by the same person. Here is what is said (keep in mind it is with the same spelling):

"Just like your wife's cookin"

"Close you're legs, it helps with the smell, just like your old lady"

"Asswhip"

"U-Catck ('k' was crossed out and then replaced with a 'h') your own trout. Limit 4"

Now I find this highly ironic. The guy managed to use the correct spelling of your and you're, but didn't quite know how to spell catch or wipe. Hmm. Let me tell you, I sat on that potty until I was through and pondered this perdicament.

Chapter Seven: The Monarchy of Creepers - From the least, to the creeps.

I have been able to narrow down what jobs entitle you to more creepiness, and I will make a list for you.

Not Creepy: Painters

Electricians

The Door and sill guys

Mildly creepy: Plumbers

(one guy isn't creepy, the other guy is; that is how it becomes mild)

Creepy: Siders

(they just creep me out.)

I didn't put the framers up there, because I haven't met any. Though there was one instance...eeee...sketchhhhh.


Chapter Eight: Hearing the Guys talk...ew.

There was a bunch of guy in the building I was working in, doing whatever they do, and I don't think they realized I was in there, so they started talking. Now I was curious of what they would be talking about, so I listened in. Bad idea. First of all, I already heard stories of what they talk about, so I don't know what I was thinking when I thought, "hey, I need proof". Basically, I heard one guy joke to another guy and he said, "You just want to put your seed in every girl". That was basically enough. Oh and worst part. The guy he was talking about was one of the plumbers, a guy who I thought was nice. More like dirty. So that is why the plumbers are mildly creepy, thanks to that guy...sicko.

Chapter Nine: Creepy Plumber is all talk

It made me feel at ease when I realized the creepy plumber is all talk.

I walked by the guy, and knowing it is only polite to smile as you pass by (I really, really, reallllllllly didn't want to), I smiled as I passed by. And as he saw me, he totally looked down, like I intimadated him or something. Ah hahaha.

Oh and other funny stories about this guy. Now I can't be certain that he was hitting on me, but considering the joke was, "plant your seed in every woman", I think it's a fair assessment that he was.

Now the same day as shying away from me saying hello and smiling, I came back from a park where I went to go eat my lunch. When I came back, I guess it was time for the plumbers to go home. As they where driving out (two different cars), I look up and that same guy smiled and waved at me. I had no idea what was going on, I thought he was waving past me. So I semi-smiled. Once I realized what was happening, I smiled and waved at the next plumber named Tyler. Hahaha ahhh, Sean (the creepy plumber) is so all talk. Thank goodness.

Second Story: I was walking and taking some boxes to the big bin where you're suppose to put all the crap, and I walk by the guy, and I hear him say, "That's a big box." ..."Yep..." ....

What was he thinking? "That's a big box." Really? It's big? Wow, thank you for enlightening me. I never really knew what I was carrying, but thanks to you, I now know what this is...it's a big box.

This guy needs to work on his pick-up lines.

Chapter Ten: The S-Farm

As I went home on the motorcycle, I realized there is a farm called, The S-Farm. Now it appears that the farm sells plants. Then what the frick is the "S" for???

The Snail farm? Doubtful.

The Snake farm? I think there would be cages.

The Safari farm? Where are all the animals?

The Sandwhich farm? I don't think those plants turn into organic veggies.

The Seed farm? Now you're just talking dirty.

The moral of this is, name your plant farm after something that makes sense, and not an "S", because who knows what that stands for.

Adventures with Construction and other stories.

I like Kendra's format for her adventures, so I borrowed it. Thank you, Kendra.

Chapter One: Going to work on my Bosses' motorcycle

So two weeks ago, my mom went to Kelowna to see my Oma, so I wasn't going to be able to get a ride to work, aka not go work and aka not make money which I most desperately need. So I was hungry for a ride, and it just so happens that my boss lives in ladner; he asked if I needed a ride. I said sure obviously, and then he followed that up with, "I guess I'll ask my wife if she needs the car, unless you don't mind riding the bike." I had to let that sink in awhile. I haven't been on a motorbike before, and to tell you the truth, they kind of freak me out, but I was never given an opportunity to ride one before either, so if I passed this offer, I may never ride a bike in my life!

So I said yes. And it was killer. Killer fun. I want a bike now. If I ever got the opportunity to buy one - plus the thing about having enough money - I would. It is just that much fun. Plus, you feel realllllllly cool. I mean everyone is just looking at you when you stop. Especially if you are just chill and relaxed. You are the popular kid in school.

That is now currently how I transport myself home.

Chapter two: Russian Clan

There is this one group of siders, and they are all russian and basically only speak Russian, because they have no need for english if everyone they hang around is Russian. They like their Russians.

One time when I was cleaning a building and my music wasn't too loud, I heard a Russian guy talking to an English speaking sider, and man, was this Russian getting pissed off. He was swearing right, left and center in his Russian accent, and let me tell you, I think angry Russians are the most scariest of people. The accent definitely adds to it.

Then he said the "F" word. I kind of chuckled.

Chapter three: Never wear a shirt if you don't want someone to ask about it.

The Electricians at work are great, and not creepers which is a bonus. A big bonus, no joke. One of the Electricians there is named Harvey. Now Harvey is awesome, and is able to have a conversation with anyone and end on a good note; he is definitely a very sociable guy.

I was cleaning the upstairs of one of the buildings (like always), and then the electricians came in to hook up the middle for wires and do their electrician business. Oh, side note for the next chapter, one of the guys, Tony, always has a radio, and when you find Tony, you usually find Harvey.

So I walked upstairs to do my cleaning duties, and then I hear Harvey say, "WCB Guitar Player?".

Oh...crap. Out of the most embaressing things to ask, that has got to be one of the most embaressing. For those of you who do not understand, Kendra, Breanne and I had a band for a verrrry short length of time called "Whoopla Cowbell". It was more of a joke title really, but I thought it would be neat if I made t-shirts, which it was, but I never thought about the consequences of it. Trying to explain about a band named whoopla would be horrific, and even ruin my career.

So to not add any major description to my answer, I simple said, "Oh, it was a band I was in."

And then he said, "Oh, so you're a rockstar?" With a smile of course.

And I replied, "I guess."

He laughed, and that was the end of that.

Chapter Four: Singing Electrician

I heard Harvey sing to the radio when he thought I was listening to my MP3 player. He did a rendition of "Sweet child of mine" and "Bad day". He even did all the falcetto parts in "sweet child" almost perfectly. He must of practiced it back in the day.

How well did he sing "bad day"? I tuned out, because I hate that song.


I will continue with more adventures perhaps when I'm done eating dinner.

My life; woman on a man's 'turf'

I say man's turf, because, it stereotpically is. I could of also made a pun and meant turf literally. Ha. But no, I didn't. I mean the real deal.

I work on a construction site.

It all started when I needed a job (aka since after college) and couldn't find a permenant one. My bro Garrit (aka bro-in-law) knew this, because he is a smart chap, and without me realizing it - though I might of semi been aware of it - he hooked me up with a job at his work. And of course you can assume that he works at a construction site; he actually works for his dad. But anyways, the point is, I work at a construction site, as I stated above.

I find this kind of funny actually. I realize now if someone asks where I work, I can say, "A construction site", and then I can watch their faces quickly turn surprised...how delicious. Amanda, working construction...who would of thought?

I probably have you now speculating what I actually do there, and that is a very good question. Absolutely nothing. Ha, just joking of course. I'm basically like a highclass/hardcore janitor. I don't even think Garrit used the term 'janitor' when describing what I would be doing, but I guess that is basically what I do. I go from house to house (very nice houses I might add) and starting from the top, I scrape, broom, then sweep, then vaccum, and if I have to, I exacto-knife. It sounds pretty simple, so I assumed it would be easy. Man, I really need to think things through.

Note: Now is the part where I essentially 'complain'. I haven't felt so exhausted in the longest time. My muscles hurt. My back hurts. My feet hurt like mothers. I have beautiful blisters on my hands. I stink. I itch from all the dust I have inhaled and practically bathed in. But you know what? I like it.

I basically get a workout while I work, but I get paid for working out. Soon, after working for awhile more, I'll basically be a hot babe, with muscles. Not huge hunky ones (eww...), but toned and strong ones. I'll be in shape, and hot. Well, that's the plan anyways.

Another great thing about working there, is the flexiblity. My bosses' boss (aka Garrit's dad) said if I want I can work 5 days a week, but I don't need to feel pressured to. I basically have the amazing option of asking for days off, and coming in when I want to. There is no schedule. I love it! Also, the pay is sweet for what I'm doing. Basically...I'll have my car soon. I'm pretty stoked.

Also, I can listen to music, ALL DAY. Yeah, I'm pretty stoked. AND, I don't have a boss hanging over my shoulder watching me work, because I work by myself. Man, pretty sweet deal I got.

The one awkward thing though is at lunch. Ill be sitting in the trailer/office eating, and the conversation that is happening around me, I wont understand or know what is being talked about. I dont know anyone there except Mr. DeVos and Garrit, so if I can cling to Garrit, I will, because Im horrible meeting new people.



But I did make a friend today. His name is Brad. He happened to being doing his job in the house that I was cleaning; I think he is a sider. Anyways, I was being nice, because it's the nice thing to do, and I smiled at him a couple times, because if I pretended like he wasn't there, that would be ten times more awkward than if I simply smiled. So he smiled back and said "goodmorning" just like a polite person should. Then later he started making small talk like, "having fun yet?" and "do you think you can clean the window sills too while you're at it?" (No, I'm not having fun you ninkompoop, and do the sills yourself! Ah ha, joking...of course). Maybe that is smaller than small talk, but I think it's considered. Oh, what made it even more awkward was the fact that I was wearing headphones (oh, other sweet thing about work, I can listen to music) and couldn't hear him if he said something. To be honest, I didn't really want to initiate conversation, because if you're a girl at a construction site, that might come off as, "holler back girl, I want to get wit chu!". Sorry guys, but I don't want to "get wit chu", I've already been gotten.



So later he tried to start up a conversation by asking, "so is this your summer job?" and then by me asking, "so is this your permanent job?". I thought my question was witty. It amused me if no one else. Then he asked if I just graduated (haha he just wanted to know if I was legal HA joking). And then that started the conversation. So we talked about school and how we both find it way to expensive so we have to work - hense the job. It was really a short conversation, but a conversation none-the-less. I ask him his name, and then we shook hands and he asked me mine. It was nice, I now know another person there. The only problem is, being a girl in this type of work setting, you never know if the guy is just being nice or if the guy wants a piece, aka hitting on you. Really, you just don't know.



So basically, doing this job you can become a babe, meet babes (if you're single, though I think a lot of the 'babes' are probably sketchy, though there are some nice guys that work there. I mean Garrit is and he works there, and he doesn't go to a strip club during lunch hour. Not even joking, he told me some of the guys will go to a strip club during their half an hour lunch break. Sickos.), get paid for becoming a babe, take some babe time off, and listen to some hot babe music. Woaw, I don't think I have used the word babe so many times in my life.



It's a hard job, but someones gotta do it....and I need the money.

Mermen do exist...and they eat veggies.

One a hot summers day, not too long from today...

Okay correction, it was a spring's day, not summer, because this story takes place this year, and summer hasn't technically happened yet; but I will say one thing, it was darn warm outside, definitely hot enough to tan.

Or go to the beach, which, is what I did.

Not by myself of course, it was Alicia and I, the dou to end all summer time dous...yeah, I have no idea what that means, just do your best to disregard it.

Anyways, from what I can remember of that day, it was unusally warm for a spring day, and going to the beach was a definite possiblity, one which I was willing to take. So on that brisk Sunday afternoon, later afternoon I might add, we set off to centennial beach to get some sun, and of course, some girly fun. (Why didn't we leave when the UV rays were at their prime? We were cleaning Alicia's college stuff up. It took hours. Nah, it didn't take hours, but it would of if I didn't help her. Ha, ah. Also, we didn't want cancer.)

So we went to the beach around 4pm, and surprisingly it was still really warm out; which was grand, because it would of been a waste of cleaning up her stuff to drive out there and then right away having to come back home again.

There we were, eating away, having our girly fun on a blanket (forgot to mention, we stopped off at a 7-11 to pick up a few, items...aka Surlpees, Ben and Jerry's icecream and two sorts of junk food. Ben and Jerry is a girl's bestfriend.), and then out of the blue, Alicia makes a comment:

"Do you see that guy?"

So I turn and face the direction she nodding in, and see this man with jeans on, a purple shirt, backpack, and boots, or some sort of running shoe. It looked like he came out of no where. It looked like he came out of the ocean.

And that's because he did. Because, my friends, this man was a merman.

As we were discussing how it was possible for this, man, to come out of no where, he comes to sit down and lean up against a big piece of drift wood (more like log) almost right beside us. And guess what he pulls out from no where.

Broccoli.

He just starts chomping away at the two broccoli bushes he is holding. Who does that? I mean, who just pulls out a whole thing of broccoli for each hand, sits down against a piece of driftwood on the beach, and stares into the deep blue yonder?

I'll be honest, it was beautiful.

He was beautiful. Well he was. I guess mermen are just naturally beautiful. It was just like I imagined; he had blonde hair.

Anyways, so Alicia and me are still talking girly (boys, food, tans, God, friends, boys...), and then Alicia points out the whole broccoli thing to me, and I'm thinking, "This guy is cool." Then she tells me to take a picture, subtly with my camera. Let me tell you, we were no where near subtle, but we did manage to get the pictures.




I know what you are thinking. Stalkers. Yeah, you might think so, but seeing as though we will never see him again, I think we can pass as admirers. (We actually saw him walk into the wilderness. We think he is going to give up his life as a merman to live among the wild land animals.)

Anyways, after that, we had a fun eventful evening picking up trash from other people during the annual junk week, and managed to confiscate two broken microwaves, one sweet corner chair, a real working lamp, a night table, and a Garfield picture that says, "Diet is 'die' with a 't'"

But remember, it wasn't about junk week, it was about the Merman.